When I was 16 years old and in high school in Texas, I was on the football team.  Playing football was’t really my passion, but, doing so seemed to be a requirement for social success, at least I thought so.  Unfortunately, on a Friday night under the lights, I had the misfortune of having a gang of tacklers fall on my right knee from the side as I was making a block down field.  I heard and felt the “Pop” and immediately realized that something big had occured.

As it turned out, I had torn my ICL and other tissue in the wreck and would be joining my teammate Jerry, who had also torn up a knee in the same game.  We would both have surgery and a seven day stay in Dallas’ Methodist Hospital.  After the operation, I awoke with a cast from hip-to-toe, as did Jerry!

We were given a semi-private room where just the two of us kept each other company.  Although I remember the pain as being severe, Jerry and I managed to keep each other company through our pain-killer induced fog.  One of the things that occupied many of our conversations was whether or not the Cheerleaders would come by to visit us … they hadn’t yet, we worried.

After about three days, the hospital nursing staff became quite interested in our lack of a bowel movement. They explained that the general anesthesia had caused our constipation and would not  be tolerated for more than another hour or so.  In fact, they warned, if we didn’t produce post haste, a burly male staff member would be sent to administer a potent and problem solving enema!

This threat put much fear into our hearts because we were flat on our backs, our reconstructed legs in a sling 18″ off of the bed, and all activities normally done in a restroom were to be undertaken on a shiny, cold stainless steel bedpan!  In order to position the appropriate parts over the pan, we had to grab a trapeze-like bar dangling above our chests and literally balance on one foot and the trapeze … no way could we put any weight on the leg in the sling.  Even so, we were motivated and the nurse provided the pan and  pulled the curtain around each of us creating all of  privacy we were going to get.

After some time of focused effort, neither of us had a thing to show our tormentors.   Jerry, being the more creative, came up with the idea of stuffing a lot of toilet paper into the bedpan in hopes of fooling the nurse.  After all, he theorized, she was unlikely to search through the crumpled tissue to judge his output, particularly if he told her how wonderful his success made him feel.  As for me, I couldn’t see participating in this subterfuge, as she just might discover the ruse and dispatch the orderly immediately.  The world isn’t fair sometimes and Jerry’s deception was taken hook, line and stinker… err, sinker.  He was pardoned and his curtain opened, signally his high performance, while I panicked.

As for me, I soldiered on.  After a few more minutes, I realized that time would be up soon and redoubled my efforts and resolve.  As I focused, I heard the door to our room open and a gaggle of female voices coming in and over toward Jerry’s bed.  It was the long awaited cheerleaders!  What could I do?  I knew immediately I had to get that pan filled, I would ignore their presence.  Tried as I did, I couldn’t help but hear the “How do you feel” and other small talk.

About this time, one of the Cheerleaders says, “Jerry may we sign your cast?  We brought markers.”  “Sure”, he said and they did.  Next, I hear, “I wish we could sign Dennis’ …”.  “Oh, no problem”, says Jerry, “he’s just napping, simply pull back the curtain.”  Screams from everywhere; from me as I collapsed on the bedpan knowing defeat and worse,  the girls upon seeing a naked dunce arched over some shiny something … but, from behind the mayhem I could hear Jerry laughing!

The point to this story is that we should always, always plan for and expect a surprise to come our way.  If you know that it’s possible for the “Cheerleaders” to come waltzing in at the worst time, you can plan for it.  Maybe, get to work on that project well before the deadline and finish it as soon as possible.  Perhaps devise a route “B” in case you encounter road construction along the way.

In this way, when the surprise springs itself on you, you’ll be more likely mentally and emotionally capable of withstanding the challenge and implementing your plan.  My Dad had a clever axiom for every situation and challenge.  If you read my work, you are going to hear from him, too.  The one that best applies here is:  “Most people don’t plan to fail, they fail to plan.  Don’t be one of them!

Thanks to TheJusticeLawyer.com for the “leg in a sling” picture and to TruthAboutNursing.org for the “bedpan” pic.